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2005 Fall Video Roundup, Vol. II

12/5/05

"THX 1138"

Talk about wacko--this 1971 flick was the first feature film of Mr. George Lucas, and as such, it's a strange film that shows off some of the sci-fi talents that would lead into his space epics later in life.  Robert Duvall stars as THX 1138, a human slave in the distant future that makes a move with his "roommate" LUH 3417 (Maggie McOmie), to attempt to break all the house rules, get pregnant, and start a new way of life.  Of course, Big Brother is always watching, so once the Man puts THX into a Matrix-like prison, it's up to him to find a way out of there and escape the underground city where he has become an unwitting slave.  At times, this one reminded me of a mix of "2001: A Space Odyssey" and "Solaris" and a couple of other bleak future-type flicks; Lucas (who also wrote the screenplay, based on one of his film school shorts) shows good command of material that certainly seems like an extension of a universe created in 1984.  Duvall is his usual self, giving the blank stare good treatment in a very sparsely-populated script.  Donald Pleasance (he of the "Halloween" series) also gives good support as a co-worker of THX that is totally insane.

Rating:  Matinee

"Kiss the Girls"

Strangely, I have already seen the sequel to this film, "Along Came a Spider"...so I figured, maybe I should catch the original, since I am certainly not going to be catching the books any time soon.  DC-based detective Alex Cross (Morgan Freeman) links up with Durham-based cops to track a psycho that is collecting and killing young, hot Duke co-eds.  Given my hatred for Duke, I was actually rooting for the bad guy in this one...but, it was not to be, as Cross enlists the help of a woman (Ashley Judd) that has escaped the psycho's clutches to track down the killer.  Good stuff--great pacing, a little gunplay here and there, Freeman is great, the story gives you a little twist here and there to keep that last hour flowing right downhill to the finish line.  I didn't like that the film's plot somehow didn't have the cops go right back to where the Judd character was found in the first place to find the house where the killer has stashed all of the girls; only in the last 20 minutes does anybody say "Hey, by the way, where did you say you jumped off that cliff where the killer lives?"  Otherwise, a great thriller that is still worth picking up if you haven't seen it by now.

Rating:  $9.50 Show

"De-Lovely"

You know, I like Kevin Kline, and (clearly) I like Ashley Judd, so I figured, why not go for a little biopic?  Based on the life of Cole Porter--played here by Kline--the film takes a musical approach to the songwriter/playwright by having his entire adult life acted out by performers in a running ticker of the big moments in his career.  This is kind of cool--we get Porter the old man along with a narrator (Jonathan Pryce) as they go through the major moments--but just felt a little weird since the narrator is able to interact with the performance but Porter is not.  Anyway, the music of Porter is great ("Anything Goes", "Let's Misbehave", "Night and Day") and as performed by the leads and the various stage performers, the production is lively throughout...but, much like the theatrical release "Walk the Line", "De-Lovely" stumbles (at times, badly) down the stretch as we must endure Porter's declining health along with his bend-but-don't-break relationship with his wife Linda (Judd).  Plus, her bad health and the later years bit just didn't fly with me.  The performances were great, and I learned a thing or two about Porter the man--certainly didn't know he was basically outed and had men in bunches on the side--so at least I walked away a bit wiser for wear.

Rating:  Matinee

 

Comments?  Drop me a line at justin@bellviewmovies.com.

 

Bellview Rating System:

"Opening Weekend":  This is the highest rating a movie can receive.  Reserved for movies that exhibit the highest level of acting, plot, character development, setting...or Salma Hayek.  Not necessarily in that order. 

"$X.XX Show":  This price changes each year due to the inflation of movie prices; currently, it is the $9.50 Show.  While not technically perfect, this is a movie that will still entertain you at a very high level.  "Undercover Brother" falls into this category; it's no "Casablanca", but you'll have a great time watching.  The $9.50 Show won't win any Oscars, but you'll be quoting lines from the thing for ages (see "Office Space"). 

"Matinee":  An average movie that merits no more than a $6.50 viewing at your local theater.  Seeing it for less than $9.50 will make you feel a lot better about yourself.  A movie like "Blue Crush" fits this category; you leave the theater saying "That wasn't too bad...man, did you see that Lakers game last night?" 

"Rental":  This rating indicates a movie that you see in the previews and say to your friend, "I'll be sure to miss that one."  Mostly forgettable, you couldn't lose too much by going to Hollywood Video and paying $3 to watch it with your sig other, but you would only do that if the video store was out of copies of "Ronin."  If you can, see this movie for free.  This is what your TV Guide would give "one and a half stars." 

"Hard Vice":  This rating is the bottom of the barrel.  A movie that only six other human beings have witnessed, this is the worst movie I have ever seen.  A Shannon Tweed "thriller," it is so bad as to be funny during almost every one of its 84 minutes, and includes the worst ending ever put into a movie.  Marginally worse than "Cabin Boy", "The Avengers" or "Leonard, Part 6", this rating means that you should avoid this movie at all costs, or no costs, EVEN IF YOU CAN SEE IT FOR FREE!  (Warning:  strong profanity will be used in all reviews of "Hard Vice"-rated movies.)